Of Young Girls and Miraculous Baskets

Any budding psychologist who would like to see Carl Jung's statement that "nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their...children than the unlived life of the parent" need only sign up a young child for Parks & Recreation basketball, sit back, and watch.

Any budding optimist who would like to see the Taoist ideas of the positive attracting the positive and causing all kinds of incredible transformations need only sign up a young child for Parks & Recreation basketball, sit back, and watch.

For the past three years, my 9-year-old daughter has been playing ball in town. Every year, the patten of events unfold in the same way. The unconscionable occurs during the first two weeks, when the grasping, self-centered coaches struggle with other coaches to get the "best" players on their team and parents who want to be part of a "winning" team holler all kinds of misdirection from the bleachers.

Things go from uptight to lovely once their fiery passion turns into self-immolation and silence. Then the good things happen.

You might call them miracles, but really it's just a matter of the coaches who put the well-being of the kids first working with the best of what the girls have to offer and putting it all together into a team. The coaches are free of the kids' parents' expectations for their kids and their unlived lives, so they see the kids as they are and go from there. They play all the girls, some sacrificing a potential win in the interest of fair play and calling out less experienced subs at the worst possible time from the point of view of the winning score.

These coaches treat all the girls like ball players who are equally valuable members of a team. Though there are some who would rather go home and play beauty parlor, the coaches never let on to know that. They send them out to play.

Thence come the miracles. Like this one.

The girl on my daughter's team who has a consistent record of avoiding the ball at all costs, even sometimes tossing it into the opposing team's open arms, made a basket. She played. She knew what to do with the ball and she did it. Her head was completely in the game and she was one of a team of hardworking girls.

That's a miracle. Because miracles are not someone else's dreams coming true for you but the result of your own persistence, patience, and kind acceptance. No magic here. Just love.